I AM BACK

It is a rainy Sunday evening today. Sitting alone in the office and while surfing the net, I suddenly remembered my personal blog. I logged in and found out that the last I visited my blog was in 2010. 3 years has since passed and so many things has happened in my life, leaving me as a transformed person in certain aspects. Financially and professionally, I have gained a little and lost a little. But deep down, I am still the same old Mukilan - stubborn, lazy, spend-thrift, an angry man inside but calm outside and never forget to scold God and religion.

2010 was a rewarding year. Business was very good. Managed to settle a few debts which I inherited from my first divorce in 2002. But, I am a poor debt-collector. A lot of my students did not pay their fees and I was forced to write-off a few thousand ringgit. I ventured into a new business but in the end lost RM15,000 to an old childhood friend.

My relationship with my second wife was not good. It was getting from bad to worst. She openly demanded for a divorce. She went to the extent of sending me a divorce petition but I refused to sign it. So, our war extended to 2011 and in June 2012 we were officially divorced. But, I lost my 3 room walk-up apartment which  I loved dearly. I worked very hard to buy the apartment and I have a lot of fond memories of it. Anyway, there is nothing much I can do about it. What is broken is broken, what is gone is gone. But, life has to go on.

The year 2011 was not so good. My business volume was down by half. I was struggling throughout the year. My mother's health was getting bad. Both her kidneys failed. In September 2011, she was admitted in the hospital and the doctors said she has to go through dialysis. Fortunately, my father was a civil servant. So, the government took care of her medical bills. But, I couldn't afford the daily expenditures. On most of the days, I will have less than RM10 in my pocket. On 8th December 2011, 3 days after her birthday, she breathed her last. I had only RM5 with me. But, somehow I managed.

After my second divorce I had a few relationships, but none worked out. I have become wiser now and very careful in choosing my companion.

My reputation rose in the last 2 years. I left the Malaysian Dravidian Association and formed Periyar Rationalist Integrity Movement for Enrichment with my friend Vinthai Kumaran. I became the Vice-chairman and my friend is the Chairman. We managed to raise RM42000 within 18 months of its inception, I was also asked to take over an ailing NGO in Kluang. I conduct Thirukural and Tamil classes for the students around Kluang.

I wanted to shave my head for good and I finally did it in June 2012. I am happy now for I have done something that I always wanted to do but too worried about the negative comments from those around me.

I have a bought a car - Perodua Alza. So, life has got a little easier.

I have developed a new hobby, gardening and revived an old hobby, photography.

I am taking my father for a 15 day South India tour. This is something which I wanted to do for a long time. After overcoming a series of obstacles, I have finally done it. I am writing this post on the eve of our departure to India.

I now recall Frank Sinatra's song "I did it my way"

Regrets. I had a few,

but then again,

too few to mention.

I did what I have to do,

and saw it through without exemption.

I planned each charted course,

each careful step along the byway.

And more, much more than this,

I did it my way.

Yes, there were times,

I'm sure you knew,

when I bit of more then I could chew.

But through it all,

when there was doubt,

i ate it up and spit it out.

I faced it all and,

I stood tall

And did it my way.